March 27

I know you are working something, but does it have to be so painful?  I know I have oft turned from your face and that this is all just a wake up call to come home to you.  I want to come home to you. but the devil is telling me that I am already lost, that I am worthless and unlovable and unforgivable.  I struggle to tune him out and rely on what I know to be true. I need your intervention in my life.  I need help in letting you take control of my life and carry me when I am weary.  Right now, I am beyond weary. My way isn't working and I don't know how to let you take the wheel from me.

the cycle of me

nothing like being smacked in the face that you are still a piece of crap.  I hope that you can work a miracle and help me become honest and genuine.  Help me to be humble.   I wish that I could simply be genuinely who I am.  How is it that I am unaware to who it is I am?  I also just want to love .  I know you have plans for me.  I know that through you anything is possible.  Please Lord let me be worthy of a change and a chance to be better.  Help me hate these things that hurt people so that I can put actions to my wants.